Meteor Storm (2011)

The old saying goes “when it rains it pours”, and in the case of Meteor Storm it’s raining space rocks, and they’re intent on ruining everyone’s day. When an innocent shower of meteorites veers off course and heads towards Earth, the people of San Francisco find themselves under attack from above, as little rocks smash into cars, houses and through people’s faces.

The government declares a state of emergency and warns about three more waves of meteorites, which will hit other major US cities as the Earth rotates… but then the meteorites suddenly aim for San Francisco again. Realising the “City by the Bay” is target number one for these confused space-missiles, it’s up to uber-scientist Michelle (Kari Matchett) to work out why they’re aiming for the Golden Gate City and exactly how to stop them before the city is sunk into its famous bay forever…

Alongside the science-bit is the sub-plot… which should be called “Super-Tom and His Amazing Motorbike”. Played by Michael Trucco, Tom is a Disaster Management Agency official who zooms about San Fran saving people – a pregnant woman in a crashed car! His ex-wife from a downed helicopter! His kids from a tower block lift! For someone who should probably be in a control centre organizing something, he does his damnedest to whip about the city in his leathers, dodging falling bits of space. At one point he addresses the nation on international television… in a leather jacket. It’s accidentally hilarious, but then, Meteor Storm is not a hugely serious film.

Ignoring physics, astrology and basically all of science ever, if you accept the absurdity of it all and roll with the carnage then you’ll have a lot of fun. Yeah, the CGI is really really bad and the characters are stereotyped to death, but it’s an enjoyable little thriller that’s always watchable. Tibor Takács’ direction is sharp and fluid and always ensures something interesting is happening, so you’ll never be bored.

The major surprise in Meteor Storm is the smart and sassy script, despite the familiar lot of characters and a relatively pedestrian plot. Penned by veteran TV screenwriter Peter Mohan, the dialogue is superb and keeps the film flowing throughout. Especially well created are the characters of TV Reporter Kyle (Eric Johnson) and his wearied camerawoman Lena (Lara Gilchrist). Respectable nods have to go to both Johnson and Gilchrist for helping create two amusing, believable characters you genuinely root for – some excellent work from both of them.

Television pros Kari Matchett and Michael Trucco (probably best known for Invasion and Battlestar Galactica respectively) do a solid job with their given roles, eking out as much personality as possible from their cardboardy stereotypes, creating likeable, understandable people. Everyone involved in Meteor Storm does well with what they have, and luckily Mohan’s script gives everyone opportunity to shine.

You have to feel sorry for the Golden Gate Bridge; wrecked by Magneto in X Men 3, sunk by nature in The Core, bitten in half by a giant shark in Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus and now battered to smithereens by meteorites in Meteor Storm. If I lived in San Francisco I would be very nervous crossing that endlessly painted bridge…

Overall Meteor Storm is an entertaining little thriller that pushes no boundaries but always excites. The CGI is genuinely atrocious and the “science” is bafflingly rubbish, but just accept it and you will enjoy yourself. Fun, funny, explosive and silly, Meteor Storm is worth watching.

Rating: ★★★★★☆☆☆☆☆

One Comment on “Meteor Storm”

  1. Rag says:

    I haven’t yet seen this flick, so I won’t even attempt to comment on it.

    But from Mr S’s review it sounds a lot like a book I read recently which I loved. If you like the idium of this film, I highly recommend Lucifer’s Hammer by Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle. It’s not a new book (hell, it was published when I was 6, and I’m old). But it is a damn good read.

    Think ‘Jericho’ crossed with ‘Deep Impact’ but a lot better than both combined. Hell, a barbed wire enema is better than Deep Impact.

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