Buffy The Vampire Slayer Returns!

Warner Bros. have finally announced plans to remake Buffy the Vampire Slayer. It’s not the TV series they’re remaking, but the 1992 film starring Kirsty Swanson. Remember that?

While there are hardly any details, filmmakers claim the new movie won’t touch the high school days we’re used to in Buffy’s world, but something very different.

But what? And will it attract the insane cast of the original? Doubtful! The 1992 version starred the mad combination of Donald Sutherland, Rutger Hauer, Hilary Swank, Luke Perry, David Arquette, Paul Ruebens and Tom Jane… but also featured uncredited bit-parts from future screen stars Seth Green, Ben Affleck and Rikki Lake. Eat that, fact fans.

It has also been confirmed that Joss Whedon is NOT involved. After the scattershot quality of Buffy Series 7 and the massive fail that was Dollhouse, is this a terrible thing?

No director or stars have been confirmed, although the scriptwriter has. Relative newcomer Whit Anderson is rumoured to be using Whedon’s characters from the TV series as a basis – maybe Seth Green can get his trilogy on and appear in all three Buffy incarnations.

The new Buffy is also being produced by Charles Roven, who helped bring us Batman Begins and The Dark Knight (and who’s definitely not a Wayans’ brother …) so it might be epic. He also produced Scooby Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed, however, so the jury’s out / confused.

Whatever the case, it has been greenlit and it is coming to get us. Thoughts? Well, it could be a good idea that might reboot a much loved franchise… or it’ll simply be another shameless cash-cow that will rape memories and enrage fans. Only time will tell.

The movie could hit theaters in 2012 or late 2011, according to the L.A. Times. You have been warned.

2 Comments on “Buffy The Vampire Slayer Returns!”

  1. Rag says:

    WHY? The original was a beautiful mix of ham and cheese. That lengthy death scene is pure tongue in cheek poetry.

    If a film is good enough to warrant the attention of the remakers, why remake it? Leave well enough alone. History proves that it highly likely that it will only end in embarrassment.

    I fear that it will be another dark and gritty origins story. Give it time and they will run out of cult icons to reinvent. Or maybe, god forbid, have an original idea.

    Oh, and your comment about Uncle Joss means no Christmas card for you, Mr S.

    • Scullion says:

      I doubt they’ll make it a dark origins story. I imagine it’ll be full of sexy teenagers, crap quips, dumb vampires and at least one CGI bursting-into-flames moment which looks terrible.

      As for Mister Whedon – I’m a huge fan (love Toy Story, Firefly, Serenity, Buffy and Angel) but recently he seems to have dropped his talent hat down the toilet. No one can defend Dollhouse. No one.

      Buffy 2011 could kick-start a franchise or slam a stake into it’s heart, but whatever’s happening, it’ll happen because Joss WASN’T involved.

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