Bad Biology (2008)

It has been sixteen years since cult horror film director Frank Henenlotter last made a feature film. Greatly anticipated by many, finally he has brought us Bad Biology, co-written with legendary rapper R.A. Thorburn. So, was it worth the wait? Well, only if you were waiting for a colourful exploitative bag of charmless nonsense…

One has an insane vagina, the other has an insane penis, and both characters are struggling to cope with exactly how insane they’ve become as a result of this affliction. Our female protagonist Jennifer (Charlee Danielson), who is supposed to be likeably bonkers and isn’t, finds ecstasy in every situation and after sex produces mutated offspring at an alarming rate. Her nymphomania is cheaply thrown at us like an extended version of Lonely Island’s “Jizz In My Pants” except without the sense of humour. Jennifer’s male counterpart Batz (Anthony Steed) has similar problems, and as well as satyromania, his humungous member has a life of its own, and only frequent injections of anaesthetic can hold it down. Both Batz and Jennifer live confused and frustrated lives until a chance encounter brings them together to engage in the most ugly of destructive relationships.

Playing like a montage of sick pornography strung together by an incoherent and rambling plot, this film is an aggressive vomiting of adolescent ideas, so utterly pointless in nature it is shocking that it hasn’t been banned for simply being a diabolical waste of everyone’s time.

Bad Biology has a ridiculous concept that is potentially wild and hilarious, but is so poorly executed it becomes a violent sex comedy circ. early Hammer meets Carry On Shagging in Harlem. There is everything wrong with this piece – the female lead acts with all the talent of a drunk GCSE student where every sentence grates, every look seems false and even the fake orgasms seem overblown and utterly unconvincing. Horribly enough, Bad Biology is even narrated by Danielson, telling us of her difficult struggle which we’re supposed to care about despite her being a remorselessly insane murderer. The direction is standard and expected, the music; bland hip-hop and the effects reasonable but uninspired.

The supporting characters are a selection of relatively unknown rappers and porn stars who add a bumbling, home made video feel to this tiresome disaster of a horror movie. No one in Bad Biology is likeable – every single person is so irredeemably flawed you just want a bomb dropped on all of them.

Undoubtedly this will continue to gain a cult following thanks to the Henenlotter fan club, but the days of Basket Case, Brain Damage and Frankenhooker are over. It has been sixteen years since he made the abysmal Basket Case 3 and tragically his come-back is a solid nail-banger. The coffin has been sealed.

Bad Biology is shockingly, shockingly awful. It is a despicable film in nearly every sense – a mind-numbing, stomach bothering festival of crap violence, poor sex and exceptionally bad acting. Even the final act’s utterly manic and hilariously bad montage of cock attacks isn’t worth the wait. Avoid.

Rating: ★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

One Comment on “Bad Biology”

  1. Sarah B DeMented says:

    This should have just been called Exaggerated Sex Noises : The Movie. Dire.

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